In a world that often seems only focused on achievement and external validation, raising children with a strong sense of self-esteem is one of the most beautiful and transformative gifts parents, teachers, and caregivers can offer. Positive self-esteem is more than just feeling good about oneself; it’s about cultivating a deep-rooted belief in one’s worth, capabilities, and potential. This foundation can shape a child’s life in extraordinary ways, opening doors to confidence, resilience, and meaningful relationships.
But how do we cultivate this kind of self-esteem?
Is it too lofty to think we can do it within our respective roles?
First, let me ask you this:
Who was the person who had the biggest positive impact on your self-esteem or confidence?
Was it a parent? A teacher? A family member? A caregiver?
Was it something they said? Or maybe it was how they stood up for you or supported you as you tried something new.
Most of us can remember at least one person who played this impactful role in our lives.
For me, it was my English summer school teacher just before my freshman year—Mr. Bell.
His name immediately came to mind as I started writing this. Mr. Bell asked me if I was enrolled in his higher-level English class, and I had to tell him that I hadn’t tested into it. He responded without hesitation, “That can’t be. I’ll do something about that, and I’ll see you in class.”
That one decision changed the course of my academic journey. Mr. Bell’s belief in me opened the door to a higher-level education that I might not have accessed otherwise. His encouragement gave me the confidence that “I can do it,” even though I hadn’t tested into the class.
Thanks to that boost, I graduated high school early and with honors!
It wasn’t until much later that I understood why standardized tests had always been a struggle—I had performance anxiety. But Mr. Bell’s faith in me helped me see beyond that. He made it possible for me to experience a challenging academic environment, and I embraced it fully.
Now, I invite you to reflect: Who played that role for you?
The beauty of raising children with positive self-esteem lies in our ability to be that person for someone else. Each word of encouragement, every small gesture of support, and each moment of believing in a child’s potential can open new doors for them, just as Mr. Bell did for me.
We all have the power to make a difference, and that is where the true possibility lies.
Having a “no judgement zone” in your home is an important part of parenting. So how can parents create this environment?
The first step is to be aware of your own feelings about yourself, your expectations, and your attitude. Many parents have very high expectations for their children but can be disappointed when the children don’t meet those expectations. This can lead to feelings of guilt and shame for both the parent and the child, making it difficult to create an environment where everyone feels safe to express themselves without fear of being judged.
The next step is to set clear boundaries and expectations for the family. Let your children know that while it’s okay to express their opinions and feelings, they need to respect each other’s beliefs and views. Talk with your children about appropriate behavior, emphasizing that it’s not okay to judge, criticize or put down another person’s beliefs or opinions.
It’s also important to listen closely to your children and really hear them out. Ask questions, but don’t force your own views on them. Show your children that you understand their feelings and take their opinions into consideration. This fosters an atmosphere of mutual respect and openness.
Finally, make sure you model the behavior you want to see in your children. If you want them to respect each other’s opinions, treat them with kindness and compassion, and refrain from judging each other, then you need to do the same. By creating an environment where everyone is accepted and respected, you are helping your children understand that it’s okay to express themselves without having to worry about being judged or criticized.
Creating a “no judgment zone” in your home is a great way to foster a safe and respectful atmosphere for everyone in the family. It takes time and effort but with these steps you can help build a strong foundation of trust and acceptance within your family.
Welcome to our training on Building Self Confidence for children and teen Introverts.
Today, we will be discussing how to build confidence as an introvert. Introverts often feel anxious and uncertain in social situations, and this can make it difficult to have the confidence they need to succeed.
So, here are the key points that a parent can help a child learn and get comfortable doing….
1. Recognizing your unique strengths as an introvert.
2. Strategies for overcoming shyness, social anxiety, and low self-esteem.
3. Developing a plan for success.
First, let’s discuss recognizing your unique strengths as an introvert. Many introverts are creative and introspective, and possess leadership qualities like problem-solving and the ability to focus intensely on a task. These skills can be extremely valuable in many areas of life. Harnessing these strengths can be a great source of confidence.
Second, let’s talk about strategies for overcoming shyness, social anxiety, and low self-esteem. To manage stressful social situations, deep breathing, positive self-talk, and visualization can help to reduce anxiety and boost confidence. You can also practice introducing yourself to others in a safe environment until you feel more comfortable in more informal settings.
Finally, let’s review tips for developing a plan for success. Developing a plan of action can help to keep you focused and confident. Start by setting small, manageable goals for yourself, and success will soon follow. Remember that it’s important to take care of yourself in order to stay motivated and confident.
Remember to recognize your unique strengths, develop strategies to manage your social anxiety, and create a plan for success. Thank you for listening, and I wish you all the best in your journey to self-confidence.
Parenting an extroverted child can be a unique challenge. Many parents may feel uncertain in how to go about creating a strong sense of self-esteem for their outgoing and social child.
As parents it is important to remember that every child is different and that what works for one may not work for another. Self-esteem should be built on strengths that each individual child has. That being said, there are some tips that parents can use to help their children develop strong self-esteem.
First and foremost, it is important to provide your extroverted child with positive reinforcement. Children need to feel supported for who they are and what they do. Acknowledge and reward the natural strengths and talents that your child has such as their creativity, their outgoing nature, and their ability to form relationships with others.
It’s also important to make sure your child has activities or interests in which they can thrive. This could include sports, clubs, activities or courses which can help them develop skills and meet people. For extroverted children, it is beneficial for them to have a space in which they can safely express themselves.
Creating opportunities for your extroverted child to help others is also important. Helping those in need often has a positive impact on a child’s self-esteem. Encouraging an extroverted child to volunteer is beneficial both for them as well as for those in the community.
Finally, it is important for parents of extroverted children to be mindful of how criticism is handled. Negative feedback can be particularly damaging for the self-esteem of extroverts. Instead of focusing on goals that may come easily to them, provide them with achievable goals that will allow for growth.
In summary, providing positive reinforcement, helping your child find activities they can thrive in, creating opportunities for volunteer work, and being thoughtful about how criticism is handled are all important aspects of helping your extroverted child develop strong self-esteem.
As a parent, it’s natural to want to support and encourage your child or teen as they navigate their way through life. Building self-esteem, and a healthy sense of self, key in developing a confident and secure child. One of the best ways to do this is to expose your child or teen to experiences, such as art, drama, and music, that can help them express themselves and build their self-esteem.
One way to encourage self-expression is through art. This could include creating a painting, sculpture, or even learning how to draw. All of these activities can help your child develop their self-esteem. The confidence that comes from creating something that they can be proud of can help them feel more capable.
Drama can also be beneficial for building a strong self-esteem. Participating in theater or school plays can help children develop self-confidence. Through learning lines and being part of a play, children learn how to trust themselves to take risks and become more vocal.
A great way to open your child up to new experiences is to take them to a zoo or botanical garden. Being able to observe and learn about different cultures and animals can help them grow their understanding of the world around them. This can then lead to increased self-esteem as they recognize that their experiences are valuable and unique.
Oral presentations are another great way to build self-esteem in children and teens. Being able to speak in front of an audience gives them courage and confidence as they practice expressing themselves. Speech-giving activities can also become a part of gift-giving occasions such as the holidays or birthdays.
Lastly, music is a great outlet for expressing oneself and building self-esteem. Listening to a variety of genres can open up different points of view for your child. And singing or writing lyrics can be another way to express the emotions they may be feeling without necessarily having to talk about them.
By exposing your child or teen to various experiences, such as art, drama, zoos, oral presentations, and different music genres, you can help build their self-esteem. These experiences will help them develop confidence in who they are and in what they are capable of doing.
One of the most important life skills that we must learn in order to practice healthy self-esteem is how to discern when to say “yes”, and when to say “no”. Having good discernment means understanding when a situation is right for you or not, and being able to act and react accordingly.
This can be particularly difficult for children, who may feel pressured to make decisions that aren’t necessarily in their best interests. Unfortunately, this can have long-term negative consequences on their self-esteem. That’s why it’s so important to teach children how to listen to their inner voice and act from a place of understanding, rather than from a place of fear or worry.
Here are some useful tips that parents can help their children use to discern when to say “yes” or when to say “no.”
Let them know they can….
1. Take your time. Don’t rush into decisions without consulting trusted adults in your life first. It’s crucial to really take the time to think through a situation and weigh the pros and cons, so that you can make an educated and informed decision.
2. Listen to your gut. It may sound cliché, but there’s truth to it – if something doesn’t feel quite right, even after considering the pros and cons, there may be something to it and it’s important to pay heed to that inner voice.
3. Don’t overthink it. Sometimes it really is as simple as saying “yes” or “no”. Even if it seems like a difficult decision, if you take the time to really think through the pros and cons, the choice may become clear quite quickly.
4. Use outside support. If you’re still not sure what to do or if something feels wrong, it helps to talk it out with a trusted adult, such as a family member or teacher. They can provide a different perspective or help guide you towards making the right decision.
Learning how to use discernment when making decisions is a key part of building healthy self-esteem. With these tips, children can start learning how to listen to their inner voice and make decisions that will serve them well – now and in the future!
Let’s explore the importance of saying ‘thank you’ and how it can help build strong self-esteem and self-confidence in children and teens.
Saying “thank you” can have a very powerful effect on a child’s self-esteem and self-confidence. When someone receives a “thank you”, it can make them feel appreciated and valuable, as if they have done something of worth. It can also help to build trust in relationships, as it demonstrates a spirit of gratitude and humility.
But saying “thank you” can also help to build up a child’s sense of worth in themselves. When a child expresses gratitude to someone for something they’ve done or been given, it can be a reminder that they are worthy of being noticed and appreciated. It can also be a powerful way of practicing positive self-talk, which is an important part of developing a strong sense of self-confidence and esteem.
Furthermore, saying “thank you” can be a way of model behavior for the child. Kids are impressionable, so demonstrating the importance of showing gratitude to others will help them understand the importance of this simple gesture. This then encourages them to express thankfulness to those around them, and to themselves.
Finally, a child’s ability to say “thank you” is closely tied to their respect for themselves and other people. Expressing thanks in a genuine manner allows children to express humility and appreciation for what they receive, while reminding them to treat others with respect. This in turn helps build their overall sense of self-worth.
So remember, saying “thank you” is an important part of developing healthy self-esteem and self-confidence in children. It can help them nurture positive relationships, practice positive self-talk, model respectful behavior, and remind them to respect themselves and others.
I wish you much success in your journey of building healthy self-esteem and confidence.
Welcome to the home of Universal Mom, where children and teens uncover their talents and brilliance through the art of writing. My name is Ruth Klein, and I’m the founder of this organization. This is where we will have many articles for you to read, all centering on helping children and teens build their self-esteem and self-confidence. Read More ▸
In light of what happened recently in Boston during the Marathon, the question that keeps coming forward for me is: What happened and why? Of course, there is a complicated thread of events that led up to this attack…and yet, there may be a simple thread throughout all of this as well. I’m into simple…I find the more complicated I get, or think, or create, the more confusion and off-focus I become. So, just for starting the conversation…what if we began with tolerance…or not.
